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I have been living at my current address for 1.25 years at this point. This is the longest I have gone without moving since I escaped my mother's basement when I was 19. I've been to 18 countries and 14 states, met an innumerable quantity of unforgettable people, and collected at least three volumes worth of stories to recount at parties. I've fallen in and out of love, been burned and subsequently reborn, and discovered many potential pursuits for my future endeavors. I've grown and matured a lot as a robot person since the day of my birth how-many-ever moons ago and I'd like to think I've made a difference in the world.

Well, what are you going to do with yourself? that little voice asks. Are you finally ready to settle down, get married, and have lots of babies? Does this self-aggrandizing post about how great you are really have any other point then stroking your own ego?

FUCK NO!

Well, maybe that last one has a point...

Anyway, in about six weeks I will have sold and/or donated everything I own (sans a few essential goods) and set off towards the sunrise for my next adventure.

My infrequent, stalwart travel companion and I will be loading up our bikes and setting out to stealth camp and/or couchsurf our way through these United States (of which I've seen only a fraction). We'll be documenting as much as we can at our blog, which—at this point—is still a work in progress. Although I may update this site from time to time, most of the activity will be going on over there... so be sure to add it to your RSS readers or whatever it is you people use to read my oh so eloquent meanderings on life.

Until next time.

Thou Art Invited

On the Tenth day of the Twelfth month in the Two-Thousand Fourth year at Nineteen-hundred hours the celebration of the twentieth anniversary of one, Luke Earley, will commence. Upon this day thou art summoned to participate in the festivities. Thou must chooseth betweenth oneth faction to supporth; the family of Ninjas, or the family of Pirates. Engaging in dress-up is not required but it is highly encouraged to enhance the enjoyment of this merry event. Nourishment and beverages of all types will be provided on this shpdoinkel day. Presently it is requested that you do not bring present for your presence is present enough. FYI it is requested however that U RSVP ASAP because AFAIK it will make things easier on teh host LOL!!!!111.

952.200.1049
9731 Knightsbridge Road
Apartment Number 18
Eden Prairie, Mn 55347

The Price of a Soul; Things I Will Do for Money

$1

• draw a doodle of your face
• come up with five sweet band names
• hug or high-five you
• write a haiku
• Google something for you

$5

• dance for two songs
• perform every magic trick I know
• intentionally lose at a game to you
• take out the trash
• watch a movie with you

$10

• twirl around until I get bored or throw up
• give you a massage for fifteen minutes
• yell loudly in public about your sexual stamina
• read aloud for at least a half hour

$25

• mow your lawn real good
• learn how and then bake you a cake
• do your simple tax return

$50

• follow you around for a day giving you compliments
• be really thankful
• rearrange the furniture and clean one room

$100

• detail your car*
• write a 2,000 word essay on any subject

$1,000

• just about anything

*note: I keep all change found in the process