Is Someone in the Fridge?; It's Okay, We're Regular Twins

omgzr, it's, like, almost April? I still haven't done my taxes or thought of my New Year's resolutions or anything. Where does the time go?

Funny you should ask:

• the Cairo Jazz Festival, where Kim made friends with kitties and Fathy Salama, who will now be featuring her in a performance about a week from now
• the birthday party, for our neighbor Patrick, where we surprised him with cake and people whom he didn't know
• the unbirthday party, which started on the houseboat but was eventually relocated to Jon's apartment (after a few hours of trying to get people moving), where I was greeted with chocolate cake and a poker game
• the poker night, inspired by the above, where I split the pot with Andy, the couch surfer
• the six days where I hosted Andy, the couch surfer, who is from Australia and who is also doing an around the world trip for a year (or two)
• the four days (some of which overlap with the above) where I hosted Ruth and Leo, the Germans (though she is actually from Vienna), who were finishing up their jaunt around the Middle East
• the three hours per week spent volunteering in Ain Shams (which is an hour's travel one way) where Sarah and I "teach" English (we mostly just hang out) to people from places like Chad, the Ivory Coast, Iraq, and Ethiopia
• the attempted chess game with backgammon pieces, which lasted only about six moves before everyone was thoroughly confused to the point of despair
• the twelve hour LAN party which ended in frustration and dashed expectations
• the party where Kim bought a rubaba (an ancient pharoahonic instrument, which looks like what a violin would have been if it were made with a stick, some wires, and a coconut shell) and scheduled practice sessions on my deck
• the aforementioned practice session on my deck, which was actually quite nice, despite the high pitched, screechy nature of the rubaba's "music"
• the frequent breakfast/brunches where I cook for all my friends and we eat on my deck, enjoying the Nile and all it's trash-filled goodness
• the Indian food night where we ordered Indian food, watched Flight of the Conchords, and danced naked in the street (well, maybe only I did the last part)
• the 3,000 piece puzzle Kim and I bought, which still sits mostly in its box (except for the edges) because my table is too small for it
• the unfortunate incident where I woke up one morning to find my iPhone's screen to be cracked, ensuring that the bottom half no longer detects any touches (it now serves as an iPod with not very much space that only plays songs via shuffle and as an instrument for me to read people's texts with no hope of returning them [sadly this also means that I shall not be uploading any more pictures {at least until/if I get it fixed}])
• the class presentation which required me to read a 400 page book and condense everything worth knowing about it into three hours (though, luckily, my teacher likes to talk and thusly did most of my work for me)
• the presentation on X-Files that I didn't prepare for except to find humorous pictures, like Mulder and Scully in an awkward romantic pose, Weekly World News covers, and Chris Carter making a funny face
• the one or two hours I slept
• the past two days we've spent without water in the houseboat, thinking that it was just another quirky quirk of life on the Nile, only to discover that someone had turned off our water in an attempt to turn off the toilet
• the blog writing

Anyway, I think that'll do for now. I was this close to getting the really good pictures of the houseboat on my computer, but I fell asleep instead. Next time, mumkin.

We Will Win in the End, Ciao!; Severed Phallus of an African-American

I've been guilted into writing another entry. You should know that I'm doing this instead of homework. Feel special.

So, last night we had a party at the 'awama (houseboat). We bought a giant tub of white acrylic paint and some little color tubes (one for every color of the rainbow, plus brown and black) with which we (we being Wolf, Nathaniel, and I, plus all our friends) decorated the walls. Everyone who came left something behind, such as: a tree, a squirrel smoking shisha in the tree, a pastel butterfly, purple pyramids, car emblems, a Koi yin-yang, or a Mayan space pirate. As soon as I get the pictures off of Kim's camera I will share them with all of you.

I painted a robot.

We also played Mafia until five in the morning. I watched the sunrise. It was nice, because, hey, I live on the Nile.

I will never get tired of saying that.

There was another party two weeks ago. A lot more people came to that one, but there was also a knife fight, so it kind of evens out. We tried to gather all the glass bottles of beer and bring them in for the deposit (like a friend did last semester, getting some pretty nice returns for the effort), but they told us that the bottles we had were not the two-way ones. Lame.

Since we've moved in the slant of the structure has leveled out (it was pretty dramatically tilted due to the Nile's water level being lower than normal), however, there are still plenty of boats that drive by, shaking our house at its very 'foundations' (read: pontoons). It's a two bedroom place, but we have three people living here. This entails one of us sleeping on the couch in the living room. Usually it isn't an issue because we either sleep at someone else's house, are too tired to care, or just cram into the bed together anyway. Other than the occasional quirk (an overflowing toilet tank which has to be monitored closely, a very clog-prone sink, constantly moving the clothes washer between the kitchen and the bathroom, stray cats), I would say this place is perfect. In fact, most of the previously mentioned quirks only serve to make living here more interesting, so I'll go ahead and say it is perfect.

Classes are going fineish. I told myself I'd do my work this semester, and I'm still telling myself that in the hopes that it comes true, but apparently you actually have to do the work, not just say that you should do it. Sounds familiar, I know.

I went to Marsa Alam with Amr (the guy who was supposed to go to India with me, but got delayed and ended up traveling on his own), Kim, Mohamed (Amr's brother), and various others. We dived in the Red Sea (Kim for the first time) and saw lots of really awesome undersea creatures, including: giant sea turtles (seriously! some of them were as big as refrigerators, with Remoras hanging off them and everything), crocodile fish(?), sand calamari(?), Bluespotted stingray, and Parrotfish and triggerfish of various varieties. There were supposedly Dugong (not Dewgong, the Pokémon) swimming around somewhere, but we couldn't find them. Bastards.

After our freezing underwater adventure, we trekked into the desert to Wadi El Gamal (valley of the beautiful; beautiful valley) which is a national reserve run by Amr's uncle. He set us up with desert huts like those built by the indigenous nomadic tribes. Then we took a camel 'safari' into the 'desert' and watched while Hamad, AKA Superman, threw rocks so fast that you could hear them buzz like a whistle. Also, we ate bread cooked in the sand, drank gibana (coffee that must be drunk in odd numbers), and camel cheese. My camel tried to kill me on multiple occasions, but what else is new?

I've also: celebrated Kim's birthday with [no sleep and] an early morning jaunt to the pyramids for the sunrise, acted as an extra in an Egyptian director's move (Moondog, and apparently it is going to be at the Cannes Film Festival?), gone on a picnic in the desert near Cairo, finished all the easy parts of a puzzle, played Double Dragon, honed my cooking skills, taken a shower, saw a performance put on by deaf actors for children, made people uncomfortable, etc.

Time is going by quickly. I start my English teaching tomorrow in the supposedly "ghetto" area of Cairo, which should be interesting. Midterms are coming up, allegedly, but I don't know if I have one. I'm planning on going to Morocco and Spain for break? or maybe Aswan, Luxor, and Sudan? or maybe Tunisia? or maybe I'll just stay home. I'll let you know. Life is good.

Satisfied? Sheesh.

P.S. Philip was released to his family safely, and is now attending classes as per usual. He was blindfolded the entire time, but they didn't beat him up or leave any scars that I can see. Additionally, Ayman Nour (whose son attends AUC), the opponent in Egypt's 2005 presidential elections (who was jailed for forging the signatures required for the creation of his party after "losing" the election with 1% of the vote) has recently been released for "medical reasons". Perhaps Egypt is finally rethinking its 'jail first, ask questions later' policy?

Naw.

Free Phillip Rizk!

Classes are all settled and I am halfway through the second week of school now. Although I am currently still sleeping on a couch in some friends' apartment, I will be moving into a houseboat on the 15th.

That's right. A house, which also happens to be a boat, which also happens to be on the Nile. Jackpot. Even though it is a two bedroom place we will most likely be fitting three occupants in (somehow), so my total rent will be somewhere in the realm of 700 LE a month ($126!). It has a wonderfully large deck with a gate that opens into the river (even though I probably shall not be swimming due to the disgustingly polluted and parasite-infested nature of the water), a sailboat, windsurfing equipment, new appliances, a new bathroom, and, of course, it is a houseboat on the Nile.

I'm excited.

My schedule is as follows:

I am also taking an independent study (which, for some reason, doesn't show up on my schedule) that involves reading about anthropological linguistics and discussing it with the professor and Kat, this other aspiring linguist.

I like my classes.

Also, apparently a student named Phillip Rizk was abducted by the Egyptian security forces during a political rally encouraging solidarity with Palestine. No one knows where he is or when (if) he will be released. There have been a few gatherings on the AUC campus with people screaming through loudspeakers and carrying signs and everything. It is all rather surreal, but hopefully it ends with a positive outcome as soon as possible. Just thought you all should know.

This weekend I am going to the Black and White desert. The following weekend will be the houseboat house party. April involves at least 16 days of traveling (perhaps with my sister?) due to the awesome way the holiday was scheduled. Ummm... that is about it.

See you later.

Bharat

Instead of rehashing each thing I did during my month in India, I am going to take the more concise (and easier) route of telling you one thing I did each day. Sound good?

Well, too bad. I'm in charge here.

Day 1: watched people play cricket in a park in Mumbai
Day 2: went to Elephanta island and learned the story of Shiva
Day 3: got my picture taken on the old woman's shoe
Day 4: woke up super early to see the dock madness
Day 5: finished a 29 hour train ride in Kochi
Day 6: enjoyed an ayurvedic massage
Day 7: couldn't find a rickshaw at three in the morning
Day 8: saw elephants, deer, squirrels, butterflies, bison, warhogs, and other animals in Periyar Wildlife Sanctuary
Day 9: took a ferry through the backwaters to Aleppi
Day 10: rented a house boat for the day and ate dinner with some new friends
Day 11: had our ticket checked four times on the train to Goa
Day 12: bought a horribly written book on how to learn Hindi in 30 days
Day 13: cheered Shane on during an open mike music night on the beach
Day 14: got a new tattoo
Day 15: arrived in Bangalore and met with my couch surfing host
Day 16: made fisherman's sandwiches
Day 17: attended Festival of Life 2009 and listened to Delirious, an evangelist, and Hillsong
Day 18: missed the banana crumble
Day 19: worked on a farm for the first time in my life
Day 20: acquired groceries and bread at the local grocer and baker
Day 21: irrigated lettuce and rice
Day 22: didn't ask the Dalai Lama inappropriate questions
Day 23: blistered my hands digging beds for eggplants
Day 24: built a bonfire for 60 Indian kids from an elite school in the North
Day 25: harvested vargue while the kids "helped"
Day 26: drove a scooter to a jazz concert
Day 27: left Auroville... :(
Day 28: nearly missed my train
Day 29: received food from my train compartment friends
Day 30: flew home [to Cairo]

*BONUS SECTION*

hours spent traveling by train: 91
motorcycle accidents: 1
motorcycle accidents involving children: 1
cows attacked by: 2
movies watched: 7
states visited: 5
souvenirs purchased: 4
money spent: too much
homeless kids seen: too many
friends made: a lot
life experiences that will never be forgotten (assuming no blows to the head): 1

Tune in next week for the pre-game on my second—and final—semester at AUC.

P.S. I have uploaded pictures to my Picasa account. Enjoy.

India

So... I'm in India. Have been for almost two weeks now. I'm not in the mood to recount all my adventures, suffice to say they've been life-alteringly fantastic, as per usual.

Tomorrow I set out for Auroville, the place where I shall be working for a couple of weeks. Everything I've heard about it sounds great, such as the friend of a friend who went for two weeks and stayed for two years, and the other friend of the same friend who went for two weeks and stayed for five.

I think that sounds like a good idea?

Anywho... I've been keeping a pencil and paper journal so far, so if you're actually interested in hearing about India and my story about it, ask me to look at it sometime. Assuming I come back. :)

Talk to you later, when/if I return to Egypt, I suppose. Bye.

Shalom? Salaam Alaykum? Hello.

In Tel-Aviv now, hijacking Wifi from some unsuspecting resident near our hostel. This is why I always will keep my network open: as a public service to weary travelers just looking for a little communication with their far away home. Is that too cheesy?

In any event...

On my birthday we wandered around the Old City of Jerusalem. We saw the Dome on the Rock, the Holy Church of the Sepulchre, the Wailing Wall, and other stuff whose names I don't remember. When it was dark out we snuck into the church on Mount of Olives, climbed said mountain, and then slid down the slippery road. We were wicked hungry at that point and ate at a delicious vegetarian restaurant on Jaffa street in regular Jerusalem (as in: not Old), after which we made our way to the bus station and rode for an hour here, to Tel-Aviv. At the bus station we asked the taxi drivers how much it would be for a taxi and they wanted four times what we ended up paying for the bus. I used my navigator skills and got us to the hostel recommended by the former ski team captain of Chelsea, where we got a room and crashed.

The next morning we rented bikes, with which Chelsea and I went along the beachfront to the southernmost bit of the city. I read a book while she looked for sea glass and napped, after which there was a meeting with Andy and Corina further up north by the marina that we missed. Lunch was at this wonderful natural foods grocery store, as well as some deliciousness from a nearby falafel place. After wandering a bit we found another hostel that was cheaper, more centrally located, and altogether more hostel-y. Back up to the other hostel to get the others, but they weren't there.

We waited around, found out they were there, but in a room, in which Lauren and Andy decided to stay the night. After returning the bikes, Corina, Chelsea, and I walked all the way back here to the better hostel. The worst game of pool ever attempted was then sucked up by Corina and I, and now it is now.

Later tonight it is off to find a piercing place, tomorrow we shall get lunch with Chelsea's friend who couldn't meet up tonight, and then we head back to Jerusalem for the West Bank, Sulafa and Muniir, as well as the Dead Sea (and friends). If you ask real nice, I might even put up some more pictures.

Kul Sinnah Wa Inta Tayib

Happy Birthday to me.
Happy Birthday to me.
Happy Birthday, dear meeeeeee.
Happy Birthday to me.

I'm in Jerusalem now. I'm eating breakfast which consists of: apple slices, jelly on pita bread, cheese, tomatoes, and cucumber. There is some other stuff that I'm not eating? In any event, here comes an update.

I didn't make the play, not even call-backs. I'm happy because that means my weekends next semester won't be taken up by rehearsals, so I'll be able to travel. Also, who needs theatre?

Chelsea and I spent all of Friday working on homework. Well, she spent some of the day annoying me, but that's usual. In any event, we left at 10:15 PM for Taba, which is the town on the border of Israel and Egypt. There was some sleeping, but there is this thing about Egyptian buses where they play a movie on the screens that come from the ceiling, which wouldn't be so bad, except the volume is at its maximum level and they play them all night long. When we arrived in Taba, we fell back asleep, thinking it was another break, so we had to be woken up by the nice bus people, who just kept asking, "Where you go? Where you go?"

Sidenote: Israel and the Middle East don't get along so well, so when talking about going to Israel or anything of the sort, well, you just really shouldn't do that unless you want to have an heated argument about its legitimacy as a state (Chelsea wants me to point out that this is a gross exaggeration, and mostly we avoid talking about the subject because it's awkward... okay?).

So there we were, trying not to say Israel but at a loss for words. Eventually, they say, "Jerusalem? Where you go? Jerusalem?" and we nod, and they point off the bus up some dark road where Israel is. Off we go!

So after this long empty road, we find that it really does end in the border. The Egyptian side checks us out with really no issues and we enjoy the sunset as we walk through no man's land to the Israel side of the border. When we get there, we are immediately aware that it is very different from Egypt's side, simply because there are women working! La de da, we continue through ten thousand gates and walkways, until we reach passport control.

So, we had been warned by Andy (who had gone earlier than us) that our Lebanon and Syria stamps might be a problem, but it was still really intimidating when they asked me to go in the little room with them and "talk". I do. We do. Mostly she (the interrogator) kept asking questions that I would answer truthfully, but then she'd ask the other questions and point out how my previous answers were inconsistent. Such as:

What are you studying?
Sociology.
Why are you studying sociology in Egypt?
Well, because I wanted to learn Arabic.
But you didn't say you were studying Arabic! Why are you studying Arabic?
Oh, yeah, well, I uhh... I'm also majoring in linguistics and I like to learn languages.
What?!?

What is your religion?
Atheism, I guess?
[angry look] What are your parents' religions?
I am not sure, maybe sort of agnostic or Christian?
[incredulous look] You don't know what religion your parents are?
Umm... no. I guess not.

On the bright side, at least I wasn't Andy. I'm sure he'll tell you what I mean when he updates. Once Chelsea was interrogated as well, and they let us through after our background checks, we entered Israel. The first thing we did is pay $15 for a taxi to the center of Taba where the bus station was. Then we started wandering around, looking for food and Internet.

A lazy day of napping and beach-side people-watching later, and we meet up with Andy, Lauren, and Corina, the other members of our posse. We wandered some more, tried to buy tickets for the 4:30 PM bus, but it was sold out so we got some for the 7:30 PM one instead. Side note: I forgot to mention that from sundown Friday to sundown Saturday is the Shabbat in Israel, which means nothing is open and no official services run. Which is why we had to wait until so late in the day to continue on our way. After more time-killing, we rode a five hour bus to our destination, watching most of Love Actually on three different computers. I say "most" because even with three different computers our battery power could not get us through an entire 2 hour movie. Lame.

We arrive, mill about, and then start walking toward the city center. We stop at a pizza place and borrow someone's mobile to call the people we met in Egypt who were going to put us up, who, as it turns out, are both out of town. Whoops! We get directions to Old Town and eventually make our way there and procure a hostel. That is where we now find ourselves now. So, I gotta go and like explore and stuff? :)